But, really, it’s Facebook’s fault.
Here’s a giant dust bunny!! I assign chores to my children, but am terrible at consistently enforcing their completion! Yay!
Long before the election, the unexpected outcome or the contentious inauguration, we were already traipsing down the path of chaos, thanks to The Zuck Behind The Curtain. How soon we forget.
On the off-chance that this theory holds even a drop of water, I’ll share a recent rant and a plan for action.
TL;DR: I’ve gone off the deep end & blame Facebook for our current socio-political climate & vow revenge, in the mommest way possible.
So, here’s what’s up, Facebook. We had a deal.
We, the participating public, agreed to only post pictures that made us look like happy, responsible people. We agreed to portray ourselves as amazing housekeepers, loving parents, healthy, creative chefs, lovers of rescue animals and colorful 5K runs and promised to always Like and Share if we love Jesus and/or would like some of Bill Gates’ money.
You agreed to give us a platform, from which to share all of these amazing things and promised it would always be free.
Then, you went too far. You developed algorithms and tried your hand at social engineering. By the time we caught on, it was too late, the downward spiral had begun. We were too angry or depressed to know it then, but we had reached terminal velocity. Now look at us.
LOOK AT WHAT YOU’VE DONE.
A perfect storm of technology tweaking, mobile access and voyeurism contributed to the current frothing frenzy of social mayhem.
Maybe we were fools.
Maybe our deal was too good to be true.
If that’s the way your game is played, Facebook, consider this the halftime locker room pep talk.
No more perfection.
No more edits.
No more crops.
No more filters.
From here on out, we will contribute real life. Real life isn’t Pinterest Perfect. It’s gloriously messy and, sometimes, disturbingly awful. Don’t misunderstand: there will still be pictures of birthday cakes, live streams of graduations, funny stories about what a toddler ate off the floor at the mall and the occasional girls night. Real life has balance, after all. However, the parts we didn’t want others to see, the pictures that don’t fit the image we’re trying to construct- those things are now invited forward.
We certainly have our work cut out for us, as it appears that ITTT has gotten a head start by replacing all cat or kitten related pictures or gifs with political opinions. I’ll do my part by adding a realistic image to this manifesto and I look forward to my friends and their friends and a friendship ripple effect, pushing back, being truthful and presenting that sink of dishes or unfolded laundry or 3pm-still pajama’d child as a badge of humanity. If neglected chores are the common ground from which we build unity, so be it. Prepare yourselves: it’s time to get real.